Netflix Just Bought HBO, DC, and the Keys to Your Childhood for $72 Billion
Remember when we had to wait a whole week between Friends episodes? Or when going to Blockbuster on a Friday night felt like the height of excitement? Yeah, that era officially ended today.
Netflix, the service that already owns half our waking hours, just dropped the mother of all bombshells: they’re buying Warner Bros. Discovery’s entire studio and streaming operation (HBO Max, Warner Bros. Pictures, DC Studios, the whole Harry Potter vault) for $72 billion.
Seventy. Two. Billion.
That’s not a typo. That’s the price of every “I’ll just watch one more episode” you’ve ever muttered at 1 a.m. since 2013, now with HBO’s prestige catalog thrown in for free.
What Netflix Actually Gets
• HBO and everything that comes with it (The Sopranos, Succession, The White Lotus, that one scene from Euphoria you still can’t unsee)
• DC Studios (Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, the Snyder Cut you pretended not to watch)
• The entire Warner Bros. library (Friends, The Matrix, every Christopher Nolan movie, the Looney Tunes you show your kids to feel cultured)
• Harry Potter, Lord of the Rings, and whatever Greta Gerwig does with Narnia next
What Happens Next
The deal still needs regulatory approval (read: the government is about to spend two years deciding if one company owning basically everything is “too much”). But if it goes through, Netflix instantly becomes the undisputed heavyweight champ of streaming.
Translation for the 40+ crowd: Your HBO Max subscription you forgot to cancel? It’s about to feel very weird having Batman and Ross Geller living under the same roof as Wednesday Addams and the Bridgerton boys.
The Theater People Are Not Happy
Cinema chains are already screaming bloody murder. Netflix has spent years insisting “movies are for watching on your phone on the subway,” so theater owners are terrified this means the end of big theatrical releases. Netflix swears they’ll honor Warner’s existing cinema deals, but we’ve all heard that before.
The Bottom Line for Us
More good TV than any human can possibly watch in one lifetime.
Possibly cheaper bundles (please, God).
Fewer places to pirate stuff because it’ll all be on Netflix anyway.
A quiet moment of mourning for the days when we only had six channels and life was simpler.
I don’t know about you, but I’m already mentally preparing my 2026 watchlist. It’s going to need its own spreadsheet.
Welcome to the new Hollywood, friends. Same couch. Way more remotes to lose.